I was told by my partner about a technique they use in social work with families and children who don’t see anything good in their lives to pick something that happens each day that makes them happy. I really like the idea of happiness being around you at all times and that it’s just about perspective. They call this ‘melting moments’ (Which I’m sure is some sort of cake!)
*ETA-(My partner just called and said “it’s called ‘Magic moments’ ..why the hell would a happy time in a day be called a melting moment?” LMAO 
….. I’m going to keep it in for today and ‘Magic moments’ can start tomorrow because I want to keep in telling you about the awesome chocolate mixture I made!! hahaha*
The idea is that your ‘melting moment’ is a point in your day where you find something or feel something that makes you feel happy and you make yourself aware of it and allow yourself to think about it and realise that you do have happy things happening in your life. So I have decided to do this for a week as I reckon that will give me time to get a better taste of finding the happy stuff around me and the things that make me feel happiness.
I wish I had started this yesterday because my partner and I got a packet of Maltesers and a packet of Counters (like the pure chocolate revels) and mixed them up together!! This made me so happy because those are the only revels I really like and I didn’t feel the whole ‘anxiety’ (perhaps anxiety is a strong word! ) that I might get coffee or orange or raisin!! … Also it would have been good to start on something that if It were to be marketed would probably be called ‘melting moments’ *With a crunch*
I know what today’s melting moment is already! Yesterday I received a book that was written by a friend. She already sent me a free e-book but I bought the real thing and I shall tell you for why later!
Anyway my friend is called Rebecca Jane Weinstein and she has written a book called ‘Fat sex: The Naked truth. Ridiculously, fat people having sex is a taboo subject so there isn’t much written on the subject. I hope Rebecca’s book will play some part in dispelling myths and creating truths by telling the stories of fat people and sex.
While I am ridiculously proud of Rebecca’s achievement my melting moment wasn’t actually receiving her book. It was that I had a new book to add to my book shelf! Since I got my kindle I have hardly bought any honest to goodness touchable books. I love spending time with my bookshelves and arranging them, not in strict order and always a little piled up and not neat but I like to think that reflects my personality a little! . (Though atm they are a mess and I have piles of books on the floor as we have been tidying.)
Anyway, Fat sex; The naked truth takes pride of place after my psychology books and near the rest of my Size acceptance books. (The one you can’t see stuffed on the top is fat studies in the UK which annoyingly is too long to fit on my shelf!!!!!) There is also a John waters book there because I thought ach.. well it is about sex and art…
BTW, Your if book is next to a John waters book is a very huge honour indeed!!
So there it is.. this is what it actually looks like btw:
and here is one of my beautiful shelves filled with delicious knowledge and inspiration. I know you shouldn’t get attached to physical things but books are so beautiful and I think in some cases they have the capacity to make people beautiful too.
A bookshelf:
This is one of my bookshelves (I have 3) and really I am some sort of book pervert because I actually feel excitement when I hang out with my books!
As I was putting Rebecca’s book onto my shelf I thought for a moment how lucky I really am to have all these books. There are books there that contain my favourite characters that I might have read 10 times but will go back and become immersed into a world I love again. There are books there in my queue waiting to be read that I am really excited about. So you see my bookshelves are such a happy place.
Today because of Rebecca and her book I had my melting moment today. (Not from actually reading it. I haven’t read it all yet ..I will let you know! 
)but because I realised how lucky and happy my books make me. I know it’s a material thing but It’s really the only material thing I love.. erm and my DVD collection and my guitar.. If loving them Is wrong then I don’t want to be right!!
Tell me about your melting moments.. what ..(Erm MAGIC MOMENTS!!).. what has been magic for you today? It can be something small, something tangible or even something someone said to you.
Love and light xxLisa
Oh, If you want to buy Rebecca’s book you can do so here. I have read a few chapters and so far I can vouch that it’s a great read and very interesting!! http://www.amazon.co.uk/Fat-Sex-The-Naked-Truth/dp/1475261837/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1347625553&sr=8-1 Or on Amazon.com which due to the exchange rate I realised actually works out cheaper! *Shakes fist*
Melting Moments is a cookie, not a cake.
I know how you feel about the books. Some of the happiest memories I have is walking into an old library, or an antique bookstore, and being hit with that smell. That musty, papery old book smell. How I love it!
Oh yeah!! I know.. Rebecca’s book had that new book smell but when I was moving an old book to make space for it it had that musty library smell… I love it all!…
I need to look this up..maybe I am some sort of book pervert!!!
I think libraries have the best smell in the world.
Ok embarrassing story: Whenever I used to visit the library when I was wee I got so excited that I would need to pee so would go into the library, have a wee look and then have to rush to the public toilet. Lucky for me the cinema was just across from the library and I would nip into their toilet!! lol.. I used to get the same feeling in DVD shops and record stores. Don’t go to record stores any more and everything seems to be online.. People are missing out on experiences because of the internet I think but at the same time it’s such a useful tool. ..meh!
Yeah.. melting moment.. I’m such a eejit! haha..
Reading your blog was my melting moment, except the parts I didn’t understand because you speak weird English over there when it comes to chocolate. Though somehow I managed to figure out you were talking about chocolate. I guess chocolate is a universal language. That’s two melting moments in one. Like a peanut butter cup. Mmmmmm, peanut butter cups.
Yay! I gave someone a melting moment (except they are really called ‘magic moments’ gah!)
I will need to look at my post again to see what all the confusion was about.. I’m sure you are right though as my head is full of magic.. and now moments! Simply I mixed two different types of chocolates together and it made me happy because they are both my favourites in revels (Maltesers and counters) and I hate the rest.. So it was like I made magic me revels!! (Oh wait..you guys might not even get them)
Anyway.. thank you for leading me to my Magic (melting) moment today Rebecca!
Love and light and good luck with the book. I have loved what I have read so far! xx Lisa
Lisa – It’s great you love books. I love books too. I have boatloads in my house, my shelves are overrunning and I have HUGE storage boxes in my garage… One day, if I have a house big enough to display them all, well, it would be more like a library instead of a house! We are so lucky that we live where we, as women, are not discriminated against and held back. I think of those women in the Middle East who do not get to attend school because the men want to keep the women in the dark. We are SO blessed! When our best friend was in Afghanistan, and his convoy would come across a group of kids, the kids did not ask them for candy, like you see in the news media, they would ask the soldiers for school supplies. They are SO hungry for knowledge over there. I wish our kids in the US could appreciate the education they get here. It isn’t perfect, but it’s a lot better than other countries. I guess like anything with young kids, if you don’t have to work for it or fight for it, you might just take it for granted. I hope you find many “magic moments” everyday! (actually, at my age, waking up is my first magic moment every day because it’s one more day that I can make a positive difference in someone’s life, even if it is just my own!) Keep up the great work! Peace Out!
Absolutely. You know I was actually thinking about that when I wrote the post. I am lucky to have access to all these beautiful words and information. You see kids walking miles to school everyday to learn sometimes with one book to a whole class. It makes me feel very spoiled and grateful.
I hope you get your big house with the library soon! I would SO have a library if I had a massive house. I have a study so I am lucky enough.. that is sort of like a wee library.
Love and light xxLIsa
My magic melting moment
today is seems kind of silly. I get to share the Friday letters I wrote when I was in elementary school with my students. I wrote a letter home every Friday to my parents with my work for the week attached. My parents read the letter and my mom stashed it away. I just found the entire stash… every Friday letter for a whole school year! I am so excited to share them with my students. I think I will share one each Friday before they write. Then they can share their Friday letters with their parents. I hope that their parents save them. One day their letters will be a treasure as well. 
Happy Day!
Rebecca
Oh that’s an awesome magic moment!!! The kids at your School will love that! I think some kids find it hard to believe that you were once a kid too!!
It made me happy to think about it and the kids will love it!
I found some old news jotters from school when I was de-cluttering. I only had time to read one but I was laughing a lot at what I had written and what the teachers had written in reply to me.
I would read them and share here as that would certainly be a magic moment to look over those jotters. If my scanner worked I could even share my insane drawings to go with my news.
Awesome Magic moment Rebecca!!. Thanks for sharing.
Happy Friday! xxLisa
Thanks Lisa! I just got home and have to say it went beautifully! The kids loved seeing my letters and it inspired them to write amazing letters of their own. One kid wrote six pages. Holy Moley!! I can’t wait to read them this weekend.
Happy Friday to you as well!
Rebecca
Wow! I would love to read them! Maybe you could put them on your blog!!
*Not sure about the ethical implications of sharing a child’s work online but I would love to read yours!*
I asked Michael if he had read Lemony Snickit (sp)?? and he said just the film. I told him I have an online friend who is a teacher who said they were great and he said he would like to read them after he reads his Roald Dahl collection and a book we got him called ‘One boy and his dog’ I think. He loves to read so he should get through them in no time!
xxLisa
I am not sure either, but I am going to ask around.
I am excited that Michael is a reader. I love readers! Once I had a girl in my class that professed her hatred towards reading. I told her by the time she was done in my class she would love reading. She insisted that she never would. One month later at parent teacher conference her mother was complaining because she caught her under her sheets with a flashlight reading until the wee hours of the morning. YES!!! Job done. Hee Hee. I will be excited to see what Michael thinks of the Series.
What a victory!! You gave that wee girl such a wonderful gift and I’ll bet she will always remember that. I can’t ever remember not reading. My mum said I learned to talk quite quickly and one of my first words was ‘book’ and I would point to children’s books in shops. I was in my buggy and my mum met a friend and I read out the film that was advertised on the cinema. She said her friend was shocked because I was so wee and could read.. No idea where that came from because while my mum and dad read occasionally they never had a book shelf or anything. I have just always loved books and I am glad my parents encouraged this. I remember my Gran taking me to the library. Hmm.. It might have been that I got my love of books from my Grandparents.. I have my Granddad’s George Orwell collection which I treasure.
I will keep you updated on how Michael likes the series. I think because he gets left alone a lot he finds reading relaxing. I have a couple of friends did their primary teaching degree (but couldn’t actually teach for one reason or another) and they both say his reading is amazing for a 9 year old. He never stumbles over words and will work on a word until he gets it.. like Latin names for Dinosaurs! :O lol
xx
That’s an amazing find. I don’t suppose you could be persuaded to post them?
Oh! I just said that before I saw your comment!!! whoooooo!! Psychic,,, erm or just because it would be such an honour to read such precious, special things!! xx
I’m enjoying reading your blog. Fat sex is awesome… funny, I was just writing about it! I too love the feeling of actual books in my hands… the smell, the feel. Good stuff. I’m fascintated as well by your forgiveness project. I’ve been involved in my own for the past seven weeks, and it will probably last another seven months or so. Like you, I’ve been unable to find really concrete help. Everything is pretty fluffy. My favorite is Colin Tipping’s “Radical Forgiveness,” but it’s on more of a spirit/soul level than in the here and now. I’ll keep reading as you move through your process, and you’ve inspired me to write about mine. Love.
Thank you. I will follow your process too. I think I will give that book a try. I’m not sure there are always tangible ways to be able to forgive.
)..weird that you were writing about it.
Glad you are enjoying Fat sex (The book or the activity either way!
Well..I’m off to sniff my books again.
Love and light to you and healing. xxLisa
Hi, I wonder if ‘concrete help’ actually exists, from external sources that is. I was very lucky with a very good therapist when I started this journey and I still remember her. When she moved away I didn’t want to go shopping for another one and kind of found my way. What I find really helps is sharing with other people that has been or is in the same boat, to know that one is not alone in this quest for healing and to trust the inside. The latter my own journey at the moment. If one has been crushed it’s hard to begin to believe in one’s own abilities and strength. I had an incident yesterday that threw me rather badly and this kind of sharing pulled me through and I’m up, if not running, then at least not in a fetus postion with the blankets over my head. I often just ignore the stuff and get on with my creativity (a very good outlet for me) which helps as well.
I know I’m butting in here.. but I just wanted to say I’m sorry you had a bad day and I am proud of you that you have managed to find your own way of pulling yourself up and you did it.
Glad you have a creative outlet too. xx
My melting moment has been finding your blog. There is so much emphasis on having to be happy allll the time that I think it tricks us into being unhappy. I’m loving that you’re exploring the things out there that will bring us to happy to see how/if they reaaly work. Fantastic blog!
Wow! You saying your melting moment was finding my blog could be MY melting moment for the day! I feel so touched. Thanks so so much!
Really glad you are here! xxLisa
You don’t look fat in my opinion so I was a bit curious about all the fat type books you have, LOL. Oh well, anyhow I think you have a good idea with the magic moment activity. I can’t think of any I’ve had today but yesterday, while sitting on a park bench reading, the sun was shining, I had a tree shading me and I was looking out on a large pond sparkling in the sunlight with ducks waddling around. Just absolute bliss!
Well my partner is fat and when I started dating them I realised how prejudiced people are against fat people. Everything from people making comments about their body (Body shaming) to there not being proper equipment for people over a certain weight. I thought this was outrageous and it made me feel so angry so I got somewhat involved in The Size acceptance movement. (I don’t have much time for much activism or anything but I do what I can.. just a little) ..I think my fat type books make up about 0.1 % of all the books I have, so not that much relatively!
Oh I have a few Size acceptance books and there are also a couple of fat erotica ones (through words and art both) too. A reminder to my partner and people who come to visit me that people at any size are desirable sexy and beautiful.
Oooh Your magic moment sounds lovely! Reading in the sunshine.. for me that would be pure Joy! Oh and with DUCKS!!!!! I love those little quackers. They make me laugh! Your magic moment sounds like the holidays I like to take!
Love and light xxLisa
Ah, I see. Well that is a supportive and caring thing to do for your partner. It’s harder for us women too since we’re expected to be slim or thin. Luckily I’m naturally on the thin side but I feel for women on the larger side as society isn’t very kind. Obese and overweight people are the last type of people we can publicly shame and make fun of without there being a public outcry. I try to do my bit by not laughing at ‘fat jokes’ and telling people it’s not acceptable to discriminate against ‘fat people’ in my presence anyhow.
The size acceptance movement is in its infancy or early stages, no? Seems like they’re where people of colour were in the 1960s here in North America.
Thanks. The ducks were the icing on the cake! lol
Good on you. If I am around someone making a prejudiced joke I try to tell them that I don’t appreciate it. Recently my partner told her cousin off for making a racist joke and he de-friended her from face book. I wonder whether he felt ashamed or embarrassed about being pulled up about it.
Yes, atm SA is a very grass roots level affair but there are many inspirational people out there who have written books, carried out research studies etc to help dispel some of the public misconceptions about fat people. There are also activists -Recently there was a Fat shaming campaign in Georgia with posters of children and statements about being fat that were untrue. (Oh the campaign was also racist as only two of the 5 children were white and proportionally for that state that is waaaaaaaay off) Anyway, we all got together and raised over $10,000 to make our own posters in support of Fat kids. I have mentioned her in my blogs before but most of this was taken on by a woman called Ragen Chastain, who is a professional dancer and clearly some sort of superhero!
There is also a woman called Dr Linda Bacon who wrote a book called ‘Health at every size’ (HAES) and it’s because of her seminal work and the efforts of the SA community that we are beginning to see studies now that Fat can =fit and that many of the diseases that were associated with being fat were in fact a co-relation not the cause.
Anyway hope I haven’t bored you, but yeah I think it’s important to stick up for the rights of all humans and if you have prejudices to try to be aware of why you have them and maybe look into it.
Also.. all that aside.. I need to get it out there!! I <3 Ducks!!
xxLisa
Thanks for following me, you have a lovely blog!
Books are awesome, I just got a new one today called Sex at Dawn, which you should check out since you seem to like books about sexuality
I like books about everything but yes I am interested in sexuality and also fantasy and fetish from a psychoanalytical point of view. I find it fascinating and am interested on some of the theories behind it all. I will have a wee look at the book you mentioned but I’m generally not so much into stories about sex weirdly enough.
In saying that I LOVE Anais Nin.. her books are beautiful! Delta of Venus is very sexy but also totally messed up in parts. She was paid to write erotica for rich people with fetishes so some of the stories are quite specific. You would probably love it! x
Haha that’s cool. Sounds pretty interesting.
Sex at dawn is actually about how humans aren’t naturally inclined to be monogamous, it’s not an erotic novel.
Ahhh I see. Sounds really interesting. I will put it on my to read list. I have read a few things about this when reading about evolutionary psychology. I think perhaps sexually this may be the case for a couple of reasons. The whole ’7 year itch’ phenomenon may come about because many Mammals pair together until their infant is old enough to survive alone. (well at last to hold their own in a group and learn how to forage etc. Seven seems like around the right age for that.
Biologically this seems to be the case too seeing as men have enough sperm to populate the world a few times over that they have till the moment they die while women have a set amount of eggs.
I think thought that sometimes you just want to be with one person for the rest of your life or for as long as you can imagine forward. I can’t imagine being with anyone else but my partner but that is not just a sexual thing… Hmm ..I can also see why people ‘chose’ monogamy. I think if people want to be poly then all power to them.. I just don’t think I would enjoy that lifestyle for a number of my own reasons. Though probably biologically/psychologically those findings are right.
It’s hard to put into words .. I guess some things you can’t explain with science. .. haha Rambles!! Excuse me!!
xxLisa
Hahaha no I agree with you on all accounts
And a melting moment or me was last night when my cat was sleeping on my lap and we were ‘holding hands’ while I read John Steinbeck’s ‘Winter of Discontent’. What a book to read when one is feeling out of it. But he’s brilliant at talking about the human condition.
Ooooh! Totally magic moment. Cat on lap and reading..
I would like to read more Steinbeck. I have read the obvious… ‘Of mice and men’ which I thought was brilliant but would love to read more. I think I have ‘Winter of discontent on one of my shelves actually’ I should go look and add it to my ever growing pile of books I want to read. ..Wish I had the reading power of Rain man!!! (Without all the social difficulties!).. Actually Rain man isn’t a good example. The wee robot Johnny 5 from short circuit.. I want to read like him ‘More information!! More information’!!
One last thing before I log out … the picture on your home page of the monkey’s face being forced into a smile cracks me up laughing every time … thanks for that. And the baboons outside my window is lamenting our rainy weather and picking lemons from my tree. I’m going to go outside and watch them pull sour faces when they find out what it is. It’s winter here and food is scarce.
Wow!! You have baboons outside your window!!!!?? That would be amazing! Where do you live?!
Going to take our wee friend to Edinburgh zoo next weekend and they have Gillado? (sp) Baboons.. the ones where the males have the big orange/brow shaggy coats. As we were watching them it starting raining and they ran full pelt down the hill with their screaming and their hands in the air till they got to their shelter where they groomed themselves.. hahaha I was thinking.. It’s just a bit of rain!!
I would love to have monkeys/Apes on our doorstep! My partner’s favourite animal is The chimp (all monkeys too but chimps are the favourite) So every year I adopt a chimp at birthday time and we go to the zoo to visit them. Can’t wait to see how they are doing next week.
xx
I live in paradise. Or as close I can get to it and still have running water and light at a flick of a switch. I’m in South Africa, in the east. Moved here recently from Johannesburg. The peace and quiet is Very Good For Me. Baboons are an almost daily occurrence. Been feeding the monkeys (and managed to train them to wait and not grab at the food!) but I’m a bit wary of the baboons. I sometimes forget to close the back door and have had to clean out monkeys and the chaos they leave behind. Am not so sure what I would do if I found a baboon in the kitchen. There’s a resident klipspringer (I think it is rhebuck in English) and an eagle and an owl and so on. Lucky me.
Wow, it absolutely does sound like Paradise. I would love to visit South Africa ..Before your post I would have said Johannesburg or somewhere like that but after reading your post I want to visit where you live!!
Oh well… we see seagulls every day. Not as exciting but they are still fun!
Gah!! I want to see monkeys!! lol
You are indeed lucky to have all that amazing wildlife on your doorstep!!
xxLisa
Lucky is not the word. I call it being privileged. The sun was out today after days of rain and torrents of it. Was up and out and stayed out there until I had to come back for food!
wow!
x
My melting moment this morning was when my kitty Neo came and sat really close to me this morning and proceeded to purr his brain off for about 20 minutes. Kitty gives me melting moments everyday
Kat 
Cat’s are the best at giving melting moment’s aren’t they?!
I read that stroking a cat for 5 mins is the equivalent to taking 10mgs of Diazepam. You were on about 40mgs there!
Melty melt melt!
xxLisa
Maltesers are sooooo yummy! I’ve never heard of counters though. I’m sure if they’re made of chocolate they must be yummy. Kat
Yes! SO yummy. They are new here. If you get Revels they taste like the pure chocolate ones.
xx
Oh, books and chocolate… Diana Gabaldon novel read while accompanied by Green & Black’s butterscotch chocolate = happiness guaranteed! Good luck with your positivity. X
ooooh!! Yes.. I must try reading while eating chocolate.. That would feel like cheating to me because I have done it before and I know it makes me happy!
xx